Things I Want (Or Need) To Know

  • Once it becomes apparent that a storm (hurricane or blizzard) isn’t going to be as bad as we thought it might be, could we please, please cut back a little on the TV news coverage?

  •  So now there’’s a TV show about a guy who eats nothing but cheeseburgers?

  • And how can his wife possibly not know that the guy doesn’’t eat anything else but cheeseburgers?

  • The History International cable TV channel broadcasts one hour on weekday mornings in a language other than English.  The language is Spanish, but that’s not material to the conversation.  First, why one hour a day?  Second, how come the commercials during that hour are all in English?

  • What do they do with half a billion eggs recalled because they might be contaminated with salmonella?  I’’m sure they don’’t put them back in the chickens.

  • Is there a US Post Office anywhere in the country that was built with adequate customer parking?

  • Do you suppose that the guy in the maroon Maserati convertible with NY plate “PP DOC” is a urologist?  I guess a supporter of one of many deposed Haitian presidents is also a possibility, but it’’s a bigger stretch, don’’t you think?

  • How come sleep apnea is in my spell checker, but Maserati isn’’t?

  • The sign on the door to the men’’s locker room at my local pool says, “All patrons must be fully dressed before leaving the locker room.”  Is this really a problem?  I mean seriously?

Author: Tom

I know my ABC's, I can write my name and I can count to a hundred.