Things I Want (Or Need) To Know

 

  • “Oliver Perez got out of the inning.”  When is the last time you heard those five words in that order?  But then Ollie gave up a homer in the bottom of the 13th and the Mets lost another one on this debacle of a road trip.

  • Twitter, not only why, but why 140?

  • Have you ever screamed for ice cream?

  • If you’’re trying to get on an Interstate Highway, the people already on the highway should let you in.  However, you don’’t have the right of way in that situation, so before you pull out into traffic, could you at least look?

  • Will they ever finish I-95 just east of New Haven?

  • Have you noticed how many men appear on TV wearing suits and dress shirts that don’t fit?  If there’’s a gap between your suit collar and your neck, your suit doesn’’t fit.  If you can stick two or three fingers between your neck and your shirt collar, your dress shirt doesn’’t fit either.

  • Mike Taibbi reported on “Christmas in July” sales for the Today Show this morning.  It’’s a ploy by retailers to boost summertime sales.  That’’s fine for little kids, but what the hell am I going to do with a stocking full of coal in the middle of summer?

  • Why do I watch the Today Show regularly when I find fault with it almost every time I do?

  • My wife wonders if the whale that attacked that sailboat off South Africa has read Moby Dick.

  • Shouldn’’t August be National Cicada Month? 

  • If it’’s a “rare and potentially devastating eye infection” shouldn’’t Channel 4 in New York tell us about it right now, instead of making us wait until Monday night at 11:00 PM?

 

Author: Tom

I know my ABC's, I can write my name and I can count to a hundred.