Things I Want (Or Need) To Know

  • Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab.  Instead of turning him over to the FBI, why didn’’t they turn him over to a Detroit street gang?

  • So now, we have to worry about weapons-grade tighty— the usual expression is whiteys, but those were kind of yellow weren’’t they?  Come to think of it, my underwear would probably be yellow too if it was on fire either deliberately or by accident.  It would, of course, become yellow in an effort to douse the fire.

  • If he had donned his underpants backwards, would they have become a weapon of ass destruction?

  •  My father read the NY Daily News from back to front.  Sports and comics, then news, if there was any.  I do too.  In fact, do you know anyone who reads the NY Daily News from front to back?

  • What’s the point of newspaper comic strips if they’re too small to read easily?

  • What did you return after Christmas?

Author: Tom

I know my ABC's, I can write my name and I can count to a hundred.