Things I Want (Or Need) To Know

Can we give President Obama his own TV show so he won’t interrupt all the other shows so much?

Who invented the common cold?  It was a really, really bad idea.

Is nothing sacred?  A woman in Dayton Ohio was caught embezzling money from the sale of Girl Scout Cookies.  She has agreed to repay $20,000.  If she stole the cookies instead of the money, and if all the cookies were Thin Mints, I’d buy as many as I could afford from her so she could pay back the Girl Scouts.

If speed bumps slow down traffic, what do goose bumps do?

I went to a catered fund-raising dinner where one of the deserts on the buffet was cream puffs filled with chocolate pudding rather than whipped cream.  Why didn’t I think of that?

If I buy a Saturn and lose my job, Saturn will make my car payments, right?  What happens if I buy a Saturn and I lose my job and Saturn goes out of business?

Has there ever been a reality TV show that contained even one iota of reality?