Things I Want (Or Need) To Know

Denmark has passed a so-called fat tax on food that’s high in trans-fats. Haven’t the Danes heard about Danish pastry?

TV networks that air football games usually schedule them for three hours. On CBS, for example, the late-afternoon football game is scheduled to air from 4:00 PM and 7:00 PM. During the football season, the news magazine 60 Minutes always airs late. There must be statisticians around who know that a one-hour football game takes more than three hours. Why don’t the networks schedule the games to air for at least as long as the median football game takes to be aired?

I heard audio clips of President Obama’s speech last month before the Black Congressional Caucus’ annual dinner. Where did he get that accent? Wasn’t he born in Hawaii?

Do you think Jennifer Lopez has ever driven a Fiat 500 anyplace except in the TV commercial she does for the car?

Night games in the MLB division championships are scheduled for first pitch at 8:37 PM eastern time. I know they want the audience in middle and western time zones to be able to see the first pitch, but don’t you think it would be nice to schedule the game so people on the east coast can see the last pitch?

I wanted to marry my wife, not her hand, so why did I ask for her hand in holy matrimony?

Do you have a Google Voice account? It’s pretty amazing really. One of its features is if you get a voice mail message, you can set your account to email you a computerized transcript of the message. Wouldn’t it be even more amazing if the emails you got were coherent? I don’t get a lot of emails this way, but for the ones I have received, I’ve been able to figure out what phone number to call back, but not a lot more.

Author: Tom

I know my ABC's, I can write my name and I can count to a hundred.