Things I Know

  • Today is the first day of winter.  Therefore, I can now look forward to spring.  I think it’s unseemly to look forward to a season before the season immediately preceding it arrives. 

  • We have a beautiful illuminated angel ornament for the top of our Christmas tree.  My daughter remembers going shopping for it with me when she was a pre-teen.  She’s an adult now.  She found one she could afford at Wal*Mart.  I took her to a more expensive store, where we bought a nicer one and I made up the difference.  She observed that if a kid goes shopping with one parent to buy a present for the other parent, often the kid’s budget expands in magical ways.  I told her that in the case of that particular angel, the reason for that is Daddy loves both Mommy and the kid.

  • If you are exiting a limited-access highway, slow down in the deceleration lane, not the traffic lane.  If you slow down in the traffic lane, you make everyone behind you slow down too.

  • When it snows a lot, the people who plow parking lots have to put the snow someplace.  They put it in some of the parking spaces.  So, it’s more, not less important to avoid blocking other people’s passage through the parking lot after it snows.

  • We got about a foot of snow overnight on Saturday into Sunday.  When we know snow is coming, we back both cars into our driveway.  That way, we can drive straight out of the driveway and we don’t have quite so much driveway to shovel because the part under the cars isn’t that bad.  It also lets the snow plow get closer to the curb.

  • We don’t put the cars in the garage when it snows.  We have a 120-foot-long driveway and since both cars will start in this weather, using the garage would make shoveling a lot harder.

  • When my house was built, it was illegal to have the garage attached to the house.  Two reasons:  cars were much more likely to catch fire back then; and horses smell.

  • With snow and Christmas lights, I wanted to buy a star filter for my new camera.  A lot of camera stores in my area have closed down over the last few years.  I’ve never had a bad customer service experience at Best Buy, but I want to tell Google that Best Buy is a store that sells cameras.  It isn’t a camera store.

  • After I got done hiring two kids from my Boy Scout troop to shovel my walks, a neighbor showed up with a snow blower, offering to do it for free. 

  • In the area where I live, you order Girl Scout cookies in February, so the only things I regard as good about winter are Christmas and Thin Mints.

Author: Tom

I know my ABC's, I can write my name and I can count to a hundred.